WATCH: Janica Nam’s Open Letter to Franco 3 Years After His Death is Both Hopeful and Heartbreaking

You’ll be holding back tears when you hear about this.

Model Janica Nam Floresca just published a 5-minute video on her Youtube channel reading an open letter to her former boyfriend, all-male dance group Hashtag member Franco Hernandez, who tragically died in a drowning incident during a trip with Janica and friends at Davao Occidental.

Janica Nam and Franco Hernandez

In the letter, Janica opens up about finally moving forward from the pain and loss of losing Franco three years ago—and it’s both hopeful and heartbreaking to listen to.

“Dear Franco, kumusta ka na? Peaceful at masaya siguro d’yan no? It’s been a while. Tatlong taon na pala. Umaasa pa ako dati na sana hindi ito totoo, sana may miracle pa at babalik ka. Sobrang hirap nu’ng nawala ka.

Bawat pikit ng mga mata ko, umuulit-ulit lang sa utak ko lahat ng nangyari at para akong nalulunod ulit,” she began.

“Dala-dala ko sa isip ko lahat ng sana at siguro — na sana kung mas naging malakas pa ako, siguro naligtas pa kita. Minsan tinatanong ko sa sarili ko, how can I stay strong? How can I continue to smile and be happy? How can I continue life when half of me left with you?”

The video showed her looking contemplative at the beach, staring out at the horizon as she narrated her piece, and included many photos and clips of the couple during their happy days.

“Everyone knows how happy I was because of you, how happy we were together. And there are things death cannot touch and those are the memories we’ve made. I’ve always thought that I’d be spending the rest of my life with you. But you spent the rest of your life with me and I’m thankful for that. I’m thankful that I was the last person you loved. Even if it was just for a short amount of time, I knew it was real.”

She then talked about how difficult it was for her to cope with his passing and it’s all thanks to the people around her, even strangers online, and their unending support that helped her through the process.

“Alam kong maraming nagtataka kung bakit ang tagal kong maging okay. Pero sa totoo lang, hindi mo masusukat ang tagal ng sakit na naiwan sa ‘yo. My love for you was the only thing that kept me going. Kasi alam kong gusto mong kayanin ko,” she shared.

Now, she is finally ready to pick up the pieces.

“Mas handa ako na akong magpatuloy ulit.

Mas handa na akong kilalanin ang sarili ko at kung ano pa ‘yung mga kaya kong gawin. Mas handa na akong sumabak sa buhay na akala ko hangganan na.

Mas handa na ako,” she said.

“Franco, I know you want me to be happy and I can finally say… I AM.”

Last September, Janica revealed to friends and followers that she is now in a new relationship.

“You don’t have to worry about me, Franco. Okay na ako. I will never forget the memories we’ve made because it was never about our ending. It was about the journey and I am thankful for the time that was given to us. Ngayon, ready na ako to move forward and live life with a stronger and happier version of myself.”

You can watch the video in full below:

(ALSO READ: Janica Nam Opens Up About Finding New Love, Almost 3 Years After Hashtag Franco)

May she continue to find healing and peace in this new chapter in her life.

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