Are You Open-Minded Enough to Try an Open Relationship?

My last relationship was in 2015. Before that, it was 2010, and the one before that was in 2007. That’s about it when it comes to romantic commitment. But that doesn’t mean I haven’t been keeping busy. I have a long string of dates, one night stands, and casual flirting. But for some weird reason, I cannot commit to anyone longer than landi.

I dated this one guy and it was going well until he told me that he was falling for me. I took that as a hint to pack all my bags and disappear. When I was having dinner with another guy, he told me about how his company was planning to send him to Europe. He asked me if I was ready for a long-distance relationship. I nervously laughed, changed the subject, and never saw him again.

I’ve always wondered if there was something wrong with me. That maybe I have deep-seated issues that prevent me from finding someone to spend the rest of my life with until I resolve them. But maybe…. what if I’m not meant for monogamy?

It looks like I’m not the only one like this. People are opting to have open relationships, where both parties are allowed to date or sleep with other people. It’s a concept that Black Sheep is entertaining in its upcoming film, Open.

Watch the trailer below:

It’s mind-boggling to think that your boyfriend is spending his Friday night in bed with someone else but it’s something that couples are genuinely exploring. A study published in Sexual and Relationship Therapy in 2012 revealed that people in an open status reported being “happier, healthier, and more sexually active than the general population of similar age and relationship status.” For something more recent, a study by the University of Guelph conducted last year showed that “partners are as happy, satisfied, and experience well-being equally.”

This reminds me of an episode in Sex and the City. Please take this with a grain of salt as I can’t seem to verify this. However, the scene is so vivid: one of the girls is talking to a guy who is dating openly. When she asks why, he said that it’s because you can’t get everything you want from one person.

In true Carrie Bradshaw fashion, I couldn’t help but wonder: maybe this is me? I feel most fulfilled romantically when I’m seeing multiple guys at the same time. They all serve a different purpose. There’s one I can run to for heart to hearts. Another for adventures around the city. And there’s someone for something more physical. It’s hard to find all great traits in one person. Sometimes everything you’re looking for is divided between a group of people.

I don’t think I’ll be going in an open relationship. It takes a great deal of trust between a couple to involve other people and I can’t even commit myself to one. But seeing myself as *~possibly~* not built for monogamy makes me feel like there’s nothing wrong with me. It also makes me feel better about myself for dating multiple guys.

Who knows? I might find someone who’ll make me believe in exclusivity. In the meantime, I’ll be with Christian on Tuesdays, Michael on Thursdays, and Ron on Sundays.

What do you think? Share your thoughts below!






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