How to get over someone you never even dated

Admit it, you’ve probably been there. It may be a situationship, a 3-month talking stage that went nowhere, or just a crush. I’ve been there too, and it sucks. It might feel a bit stupid crying over someone you were never in an official relationship with, but your feelings are valid. It’s heartbreak, and no matter what, heartbreak isn’t the best thing to go through.

For a time, I didn’t know how to deal with moving on from someone I never even dated. I also felt very judged because it took me so long to move on despite how short and unofficial the “relationship” was. Now that I’ve put that chapter of my life behind me, I feel like it’s just right to share how I was eventually able to do so.

7. Acknowledge the heartbreak.

Even though it feels like you aren’t supposed to be heartbroken because things were never official, you have to acknowledge the heartbreak. Sometimes, a heartbreak from someone you never even dated hurts more because you’re focused on the “what ifs.” There are so many questions of what could’ve been if you two actually had an official relationship. That’s why it’s completely okay to be sad about it.

6. Surround yourself with people you know who love you.

When you’re going through heartbreak, it’s easy to fall into the “nobody loves me” mentality. Even if it’s overwhelming, you have to remind yourself that it isn’t the end of the world for you. When you surround yourself with people who love you, it’s easier to get out of that mentality and eventually move on from the negative mindset.

5. Stop listening to sad songs.

It’s scientifically proven that music can greatly affect one’s mood. While it is therapeutic to listen to your sad playlist when the heartbreak is still fresh, constantly listening to it can prolong the sadness you feel. Sometimes, it’s best to listen to songs that make you happy. It’s going to help your feelings, and eventually, it may help you move on.

(Trust me on this one. I listened to Frank Ocean’s Blonde three times a day when I was going through it, and it honestly wasn’t the best coping mechanism)

4. Try dealing with it in a healthy way.

If you’re thinking of binge-drinking, please, don’t do it. While it may be a good idea to drink to forget about it, don’t do it every day.  Doing so isn’t the healthiest way to deal with heartbreak because it’s a temporary fix. Personally, I also thought it was good to drink every weekend. but as time passed by, I realized it wasn’t helping. Instead, I started meditating and working out (cheesy, I know, but it did help).

3. Take a social media break, if you can.

I think taking a social media break was one of the things that helped me the most. With technology, it’s so easy to check that person’s Instagram or Facebook. If you keep checking, you’ll still have that sense of attachment to them. It’s addicting to constantly check their socials and see what or how they’re doing. It may feel good to know, but that doesn’t mean it’s healthy. However, if you can’t just quit social media, it’s good to probably unfollow them or simply just mute (so they won’t know) them from your timeline.

2. Slowly realize that there’s plenty of fish in the sea.

There are so many people in the world. It’s easy to keep on thinking that they were “the one.” Chances are, they’re probably not and it was the universe’s way of telling you so. When you’re ready, maybe try slowly getting back into the dating game and take the heartbreak as a lesson (but don’t start dating JUST to move on from them!). Slowly, you’ll realize that there are more options, and you may finally find the one who’s meant for you.

1. Know that you’ll eventually move on from it.

I once saw a quote that went something like, “One day, you’ll wake up and realize it’s over.” When I was going through this sad time, I kept asking myself when it will be over. I always reminded myself that I will eventually move on from it. So for the time being, just let things take its course and trust that it will happen at the right time.

How did you move on from someone you never even dated?


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