Getting your heart broken SUCKS. It hurts—like, a lot—that sometimes the pain even becomes physically real. You can’t do anything; you don’t want to do anything. It makes you want to stop being a functioning adult.
BUT—like in the best movies, books, and stories we hear, heartbreaks are (whether you believe it or not) sometimes life’s way to lead us to the right direction, help us grow and become even better people and, for some lucky ones, even lead you to the right one.
But how does one even recover from such heartache? We asked members of our WhenInManila community, WIM Squad, “what got you through your worst heartbreak?” and here are some of the many, real, crazy, and lovely responses we got.
14. Get the heartbreak starter pack
“Coffee crumble ice cream solo pack.”
– Tintin Manalang
13. Our new life motto: “Palitan, wag iyakan!”
“Reinstall Bumble. Bakit mo iiyakan kung pwede mo namang palitan.?”
– Jeibu Ando
12. Don’t forget those who still love you
“I was in a 6-yr relationship when my then bf decided to breakup with me. What got me through it was spending more time with family and friends. Being with the people who truly loves me helped me realize that even if that person left me, there are still a lot of people who would stay beside me and would make me feel loved.”
– Aileen Charmagne Erazo
11. Go on a “holiday”
“I went on an ALCOHOLIDAY”
– Isa Rodriguez
10. Stay kind to yourself
“I stayed kind to myself. I gave myself all the time I needed to cry. I screamed if I had to. I removed everything that will remind me of him. I read books that helped me a lot in understanding the pain.
Two months passed, I saw the progress. My heart felt lighter. When you give yourself time, when you understand that it’s not fault you are hurt, when you know that you’ve been a good partner, when you realize that being hurt does not equate to you being a bad person, you’ll wake up with brand new eyes, with a broader perspective about life, wiser, stronger, and you may even be thankful you were once hurt.
Four years of relationship and two months of mourning. And now it has been four months and I began dating again, not because I’m lonely, but because I’m ready and I will not let any tragedy stop me from loving again.
Let it all out, but stay kind to yourself. Be patient. Have faith.”
– Vina Sevilla
9. Some very real talk
“Nothing. My heart still breaks when I think about it.”
– Anj Rodriguez
8. Go running
“I signed up for a full marathon (42K) to find an outlet and to divert the pain. Then I fell in love with running, became fit and made lots of friends. Ayun, “who you” na sya sa akin ngayon! ?”
– Jhay-Ann Santos
7. Writing saves
“Wrote a lot even if my writings didn’t make sense.”
– Ada Mariae
6. Social media detox
“Blocking her social media accounts made it easier at first. Cutting toxicity really helps. I drowned myself in school and work and I focused on doing things for myself. I did a lot more [photo] shoots, had more solo adventures and hung out with my friends more. In no time, I was able to accept where we got it all wrong and forgetting was much easier.”
– Josh Trinidad
5. A good alternative
“Kinaibigan ko sya.”
– Ana Gizelle Caoile
4. Practicing self-love
“Focused on loving myself instead of feeling bad for myself because of what happened. Taught myself to focus on what I was grateful for every time I caught myself thinking negative thoughts. Remembered that every time things don’t work out the way I want them to, something better always happens. Also did a lot of yoga and meditation. Basically self-love talaga and endless positivity.”
– Jesh Orquina
3. Seek silence and solitude
“Meditation and exercise! Helps you ease your flow of thought ♡ We tend to get caught up in our own pride and self-pity that we fail to make sense of the whole situation. Spend a lot of time in solitude too. See the forest for the trees and never let your emotions take the wheel. It’s one thing to be attached and another to love 🙂 Focus on what’s best for you, because you’re all you really have in the end.”
– Drei Zamuco
2. Build a wall of love
“I was able to cope with the worst break up ever by decorating the blank wall in my room with photos of the people in my life that I loved and made me happy. I did this so that I could wake up every single day and remember that I still had so many reasons to smile despite losing him. It made me feel like he wasn’t actually “my world”. He was only part of it. One that was filled with so many other things and people who helped me get through the toughest times in my life. Short after, this wall also became my coping mechanism for my depression which I got through after some time.”
– Kyra Yu
1. Get a pet
“The worst heartbreak I had was 5 years ago. I lost my little princess, my supposed to be daughter, due to [miscarriage]. It had me in a fit of depression; drinking, overworking and all.
I did everything to forget. Traveled, binge-watched movies, drowned myself in TV series and ate wrongly. Until someone slapped my senses in a different manner; a random friend suggested I take care of a pet.
She gave me a Siberian Husky, named him Nathan. He was too playful and yet very comfortable with. He always welcomes me home and all, and when I’m stressed, he plainly just buries himself in my armpit. He reminded me that being happy is a choice. That moving on is a process too.
Nowadays, I always am thankful of having Nathan. I get to do many things with full smiles and fight through the heartbreak. I appreciate what my wolf looking buddy has done and now, whenever I go to my late daughter’s mausoleum, I bring the unexpected buddy that saved my heart.”
– From a guy who just wanted to be named “Difference”
How about you? How did you get through your worst heartbreak? Tell us your story in the comments.
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Some responses have been edited for clarity and brevity. Cover artwork by @GiovanniEspositoIllustrator on Facebook.