Bianca Gonzalez is the epitome of the ideal Filipina. She’s beautiful, smart, funny, and talented, and is one of the few showbiz names who has made a name for herself without showing skin (or acting in lead roles). This multi-hyphenate has hosted TV shows, written a book (aside from her weekly columns at a newspaper and her editorial gig at a women’s magazine), and represented the Philippines for UNICEF. And oh, she is the wife of Philippine Basketball Association (PBA) player JC Intal. If there’s one lady young girls everywhere should look up to, it’s Bianca.
But during her guesting at Boy Abunda’s weekly show The Bottomline, she revealed that she was in an abusive relationship in high school. In that relationship, her then-boyfriend physically and verbally abused her, leading her to become rebellious. According to Bianca:
May bad boy lang akong boyfriend noon in high school. [He abused me ng] verbal, physical. Naalala ko ‘yung unang unang beses was tinulak ako tapos nahulog ako sa ground. Tapos hindi ako makagalaw kasi hindi ako makapaniwala that that just happened.
(I had a boyfriend in high school who was a bad boy. He physically and verbally abused me. I remember the first time he hurt me was when he pushed me and I fell to the ground. I couldn’t move because I couldn’t believe that that just happened.)
Bianca Gonzalez and Boy Abunda on The Bottomline
Even after the incident, she made the effort to go back to him, even after he continuously abused her.
Meron silang way na pagkatapos kang masaktan, magso-sorry sila in a super malambing way na mafi-feel mo na, ‘Oo nga, ginagawa lang niya ito kasi mahal niya ako.’ Ang mangyayari, lagi siyang makikipag-break sa akin tapos ako yung ayusin na natin,
(They usually have a way that after hurting you, they apologize in a sweet way and you’d feel ‘Yeah, he’s just doing this because he loves me.’ He would always break up with me but I would make the effort to get back with him.)
This happened repeatedly, until Bianca got fed up and decided not to get back with him.
Naalala ko may one fight kami na nakipag-break siya tapos sabi ko okay. Tapos nagulat siya na hindi ko na gustong ayusin. Super cut communication kasi that relationship was tago. Apparently a mother senses that so whenever he would go to the house, ayaw talaga ng mom ko
(We had one fight where we broke up, and I said okay. He was surprised that I didn’t try to get back with him. I cut all communication with him because our relationship was a secret. Apparently a mother senses that so whenever he would go to the house, my mom wouldn’t let him in.)
They officially broke up and parted ways, but after a year, he visited her again. This time, he apologized because his younger sister once came home crying, because a boyfriend had hit her. According to Bianca, he then realized what he did wrong. Bianca did not name the ex-boyfriend.
What do you think? How should women protect themselves from abusive men? Share your thoughts below!