20 Reasons Why We Did Not Like Transformers 4: Michael Bay Does It Again

20 Reasons Why We Did Not Like Transformers 4: Michael Bay  Does It Again

Let me start this article off by saying that we clearly did not like the movie. So if you are an uber Transformers fan, this might not be a good read for you.  We generally try to find the good in practically anything geek-related, like this movie, but unfortunately, this wasn’t really what we found with Transformers 4.

And so, with a heavy heart, I have to admit that I could only find two good things about Transformers 4: ONE -Mark Wahlberg’s left bicep and TWO – Mark Wahlberg’s right bicep.

As for finding bad things about Transformers 4, well… that’s what this article is really for. And so, I bring to you…

20 Reasons Why We Did Not Like Transformers 4: Michael Bay Does It Again

Oh and needless to warn you…. SPOILERS AHEAD!

1. The casting just went to waste.

I’m not going to say that they got really bad actors for the movie because, well, they didn’t. In fact, I’m a huge fan of Mark Wahlberg (and his body), Stanley Tucci and Kelsey Grammer… But why they said ‘yes’ to this movie is beyond me. Let’s go through them one by one, shall we?

2. Mark Wahlberg didn’t work.

Were we really supposed to believe that Mark Wahlberg (and his body) is a geeky inventor who, with that body, seems to have trouble jumping down several flights of a Chinese apartment building? Marky Mark, you and your body could’ve jumped down from the roof of that building, survived the jump unscathed and we would have believed it… especially with all of the other crappy things in the movie that we were supposed to believe.

Transformers 4
 

3. Kelsey Grammar’s character made no sense.

Basically, Kelsey Grammer’s main plot or mindset in the movie was that ALL aliens are bad! That there are no Autobots or Decepticons or good aliens or bad aliens. ALL aliens are just bad for humans and ALL aliens should be killed. This was his firm belief throughout the entire movie! However, Kelsey Grammer also works with another robot alien throughout the entire movie at the same time. Talk about hypocrisy (though I guess this makes sense if there was a deeper underlying meaning to this, but I doubt that).

4. Stanley Tucci didn’t work.

Mr. Bald Man’s character was taken from approximately four Steve Jobs autobiographies. Of course, Michael Bay first ripped it apart, added water and colouring, and called it Kool-Aid. Also, was he supposed to be annoying or endearing? He was just too much of everything and his character flip-flopped from one side to another virtually every other scene!

Transformers 4

 
5. The boyfriend was useless.
 
Why did he park his sports car in a corn field? Why didn’t he drive any other car after that? Why was he useless after his first scene? Why are bananas yellow? His main role in the movie was to mention the Red Bull product placement and drive a Red Bull logo-filled car.
 
 
6. The daughter was a disgrace.
 
Everyone’s trying to protect this chick. Her dad (Mark Wahlberg) wants to save her. Her boyfriend wants to save her. Optimus Prime blows his cover to save her. But why? She’s completely useless. And she’s downright annoying, even for a teenager. They go out and steal supplies and instead of getting, I dunno, more comfortable shoes to run in, she steals a tight shirt instead. And whey pro. And a huge bottle of mouthwash, so she and her boyfriend can MOMOL. And, oh, while fleeing from an alien ship and crossing a hanging ‘bridge’, she whines. Just let her die already. And she lives in this field out in the country, but seems completely comfortable wearing heels and wedges the whole time…. while out on the grass… or on the dirt roads….. in wedges…. Have you tried walking on rocky dirt roads in wedges? It ain’t easy!
 
 
7. The cheesy lines were unbearably cheesy.
 
Everything from the dad-to-daughter fights to the friendly banter to the evil villain tag lines and even the way they ooohhhd and ahhhhd was bad! Even Optimus Prime was bad (and Optimus Prime is usually never bad)! Michael Bay tried to hide horrible text with the godly Optimus Prime voice, but sadly, it did not work!
 
 
8. The Dinobots had a poor background story.
 
What the hell was up with that?! They were just there hanging out on the ship? Conveniently there to be found when the Autobots needed them? Oh, and they were “wild”? But Optimus Prime tamed them in a minute?! WTF! Just because kids like robots and kids like dinosaurs doesn’t mean you should force an improperly planned Dinobot group into a movie where they made no sense to be in, other than be big Hulk-type smashers. I loved Grimlock and wished he could have had a better role in this! It would have been nice to get a better background story of the Dinobots and build on that. Also, it was totally unnecessary for that Dinobot to bust through that ancient Chinese pillar-wall thing.
 
Transformers 4
 
9. The “Alien Gun” made no sense.
 
That super sword gun that Mark Wahlberg had was insane! A gun that was roughly the size of a normal rifle would be smaller than the finger of a Transformer. Yet, this gun, when held by Marky Mark, all of a sudden turns into some sort of super bazooka that was killing Transformers!
 
 
10. A lot of other things didn’t make sense.
 
How the hell did 5 Autobots kill 50+ Decepticons?? What was with the King Arthur moment? And oh, surprise! Optimus Prime can fly to outer space! If you could fly to outer space, why were you wasting so much time driving around in ultra slow truck mode throughout the movie? And of course, Optimus could get all of the humans out of the way in like 60 seconds, but he just had to wait til the bad guys were 2 seconds away from shooting the daughter before he intervened. Ergh. 
 

11. The Transformers were like magicians! 

The flying, disintegrating, teleporting or whatever that was, transforming process of the “new” human made transformers. That made no sense at all! They were flying in the air and teleporting their molecules or something?!?! Those weren’t “Transformers”; that was more like magic or teleporting!
 
 
12. The ads, brands and product placements were over the top!
 
There is a subtle and smooth way to put those in there, but nooooooo, Michael Bay dedicates full shots to these damn products and brands seemingly in every other scene! It was just too over the top on how everything was a sellout in this movie. 
 
Transformers 4 
 

12. The storyline was all over the place and the themes were misplaced.

It began with extinction and ended up with interstellar beef between a really angry not-Autobot not-Deception dude and Optimus Prime. There’s an artifact-bomb chorva and a family love story thing in-between.

Dad going through single parent issues. Teen girl going through parent issues. Boy goingthrough impress-dad issues. Michael Bay going through I’m-not-creative-so-let’s-blow-some-more-CGI cars with massive ‘Bud Light’ and ‘Victoria’s Secret’ logos on them.

 

14. The whole ‘you’re a mistake’ thing got annoying.

I don’t know about you, but I thought it was uncool for Mark Wahlberg to keep repeating that his daughter was a mistake over and over again. And hiding it behind a cheesy line (i.e. “sometimes, we make mistakes, but they end up turning into amazing things” or whatever it was) doesn’t change the fact that you’re calling a daughter a mistake. Which is, I repeat, UNCOOL. Even if you’re Marky Mark.

 

15. There were racial stereotypes left and right. 
 
They don’t just target sensitive single parents, either. Fat soldiers are automatically heavy-weapon guys and Asian ones are samurai. Right? And since the boyfriend is Irish, let’s call him “Lucky Charms”. Of course, the female Chinese power-suit EA knows kung fu. And that random Chinese dude with groceries in the lift – guess what? He knows kung fu, too! Speaking of that samurai Autobot, how the hell did he come up with that ridiculous costume? And why was his face not machine-like? Is it the flawless Asian skin to blame? Of course, he had a strong Japanese accent, too.
 
Transformers 4

16. Can I re-emphasize how bad the casting was? 

Marky Mark as a dad felt wrong. He looked like he could have been dating his “daughter” in the movie. He did not feel like a “dad” or, as mentioned earlier, as the “geek / inventor” type of guy. But, oh, wait… That’s why they keep talking about how she was a ‘mistake’ when he was in high school (…or was it college?) all the time. Anything to emphasise that he is a young dad and that the casting makes oh-so-much-sense.

 

17. The Michael Bay camera style is so amateurish.
 
Why was the camera always so shaky?!?!? Were they filming with a camera phone? This concept of making the camera move so much so it looks like there is more action going on is so amateur. Grow up, Michael Bay! Learn how to use a camera the right way!
 
 
18. The bad guys always have to give a line.
 
I HATE HATE HATE it when villains have a catch phrase or tag line or explanation or whatever dialogue right before they shoot the good guy. It’s in those precious few seconds that the good guy will somehow find a way to turn the situation around or some good guy ally will step in and save the hero…. This happened too many times in the movie.
 
 
19. Everyone kept finding each other so conveniently throughout the world. 
 
Whether in a giant space ship, in a crowded city in China, lost in the jungle or wherever, there were just too many “convenient” finds. Characters finding each other, finding dinobots, finding guns, etc. Made for easy but poor storytelling.
 
 
20. It is even clearer now that Michael Bay is a fluke.
 
The first Transformers movie was ok. The second one not-so-much. I didn’t even bother with the third. I wish I hadn’t bothered with the fourth. The least Michael Bay could do was end the movie much earlier than after the 2 and a half hours of torte that we went through, but that didn’t happen.

Not even explosions could save this one.

Transformers 4

Oh and also, here’s the current rottentomatoes score for Transformers…. a whopping 17% approval rating from the critics. 

trasformers 4 movie review age of extinction wheninmanila rotten tomatoes rottentomateos

But of course, that’s just our 2 cents. Our own opinions on why we didn’t like the movie. 

How about you? What did you think of Transformers 4? 

  

20 Reasons Why We Did Not Like Transformers 4: Michael Bay Does It Again






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