4. Skip the coffee.
Coffee is safe (and frankly, boring. *Maybe that’s why you need coffee to keep you awake?) — which is exactly why people choose to meet for the first time over coffee. It requires less commitment than dinner, and if the date goes south, you can always say you already made dinner plans elsewhere… And if it’s amazing, you can always suggest that you’re hungry and want to eat somewhere.
But, maybe it’s time you just be a little more adventurous (with VDay coming up and all) and try to make the date less awkward. “Why don’t we… Try archery?” “Why don’t we… Try this new ice cream place that opened up in San Juan?” Get creative.
* ”Why don’t we…” is a feature of Diptyc that allows users to suggest different date ideas.
3. Meet at the venue.
Sure, it’s always great when the guy picks you up for the first date, but for safety purposes for the first time you’re meeting up, meet at the venue.
The first time I went on a date with a guy I was talking to for a few weeks online (this was pre-Diptyc era — maybe 3 years ago), I remember entering his car and thinking — “THIS GUY COULD HAVE EASILY KIDNAPPED ME!” Okay, I’m very paranoid with things like this. I laughed and told him about it — and he admitted that as soon as I entered, he thought “THIS GIRL COULD HAVE STOLEN MY CAR”. Oh man, how online dating has gone a long way, but it could never hurt to be safe.
As for going home, if you had a good time with each other, and the person doesn’t scream crazy — go ahead, be chivalrous.
2. Be vocal about what you want.
Let’s be real, a lot of dating platforms have been associated with hooking up. Unlike face-to-face conversations, the person you’re talking to can’t read your body language — even if what they just said made you cringe. Given the benefit of the doubt, a lot of things could be miscommunicated over text.
Here’s what I think: know what you want. Why did you sign up in the first place? You want to hook up or you want to date?
Remember: You are in control. You just have to say what you want. If you’re looking to date and the hot DTF (*Down to Fornicate) guy doesn’t want to go to dinner, then move on to the next match. We’re all driven millennials here; no need to waste our time.
1. Know that online dating is all about trial and error.
Just like how dating works, who you meet online is all about trial and error. Don’t be discouraged if you end up meeting a douchebag — of all the people online right? You just had to meet that person. The beauty of online dating is that it connects you with a lot of people.
The first time I went out with someone online (pre-Diptyc), he was a creep. Thankfully, I didn’t give up. If I was on the site, there must be someone on there who thinks like me, too. They were hard to find, but it was worth it. I’ve met business partners, good friends, people who have helped me with the startup life, and yes, I’ve even dated a few good men.
So don’t give up. You’d be surprised who you can meet online!
Dating in the modern world is complicated enough. Meeting someone to date, shouldn’t be. Don’t limit yourself to the people who are within your circle. Stop asking your friends to set you up with someone. Let’s face it, while everyone wants to meet their match in the most serendipitous way, it’s a rarity nowadays. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather have it my way.
Article by Jieneb Kho.
Jieneb is the Head of Marketing and PR for Diptyc.ph, the country’s first exclusive online dating community for professionals. When she’s not writing pitches or talking about the joys (and pains) of dating, she powerlifts in her free time.