It’s 2016.
And yet, women of all age, background and status are still being sexually harassed.
A few days ago, Rhian Ramos posted a lengthy message on her Instagram account where she spoke up about her firsthand experience of sexual harassment. On her post, Rhian also mentioned that she vented out on social media to raise awareness on the fact that sexual harassment is happening “everywhere, all the time”.
Here’s the full post:
I haven’t been online the past couple of days. I’ve been wracking my brain trying to figure out what the right thing to do is for someone in the situation. Two nights ago, my friend invited me out and I because I had been turning everyone down for the past four months (as I had been working on a show) I decided to go. On the same night, some guy was out, partying a little too hard and goes up to me and squeezes my rear. I always used to think of myself as a strong enough girl that if the day ever came that someone would do this to me, I’d fight back. Honestly, it’s different when you’re already in the situation. I was stunned and didn’t know what to do. Naiyak lang ako. I told 2 guy friends about what happened. The first talked to the guy, came back to me and said, “hindi daw siya yung gumawa nun.” This made me feel even worse. So my 2nd friend stepped in and asked me if i wanted the man thrown out. I said I wanted an apology. He brought him to me and kneeled down and apologized. I said that if he decides to stay, stay far away from me. It didn’t even make me feel even better. It was a “sorry I got caught, not sorry I did that” kind of situation. Upon leaving, the same man squeezed me again and ran out. I was in tears. I then went after him and emotionally, I was out for blood.. but I was too late. The security told me he had taken his car and left. This wasn’t something I was willing to let go. I couldn’t understand why a man would feel the entitlement to touch a woman without her consent. To take something from her by force. I was in slacks, and a loose top. At no point did I even make eye contact with this man. What did I do to ask for this? When I had slept over it, yesterday, I realized that EVEN IF I had been scantily dressed, it is NOT the woman’s fault that a guy would treat her that way. That moment, sir, says more about the kind of man that you are. I hated him even more for making me question myself. With a bit of investigating, I found his name, business, family and friends, and a bit of back story. It turns out he has daughters and for their sake, he will remain anonymous throughout this post. He’s back in Cebu now and I won’t be speaking to him personally, but he can expect a message from me before the day ends. I’m still quite upset and feel that it would have been more vindicating to have hassled this man, courtesy of me and all those fighting against street harassment. But the real reason why I needed to vent this all out here, is because these things happen everywhere, all the time, and I want to speak to all of the people that this situation represents. To remind women not to question themselves. To remind the guys to defend the honor of the girls they invite out (and if you can’t do it, huwag ka nang mangimbita.) To remind fathers to think about what they would do if someone had touched their daughters. And to encourage men to read up on what is considered Sexual and Street Harassment. I hope street harassment will be penalized not only in QC, but in the rest of the Philippines as well.
Two days after posting this, Rhian mentioned on a following post how she received lots of support and personal messages from other women who experienced the same thing. She ended it by saying, “Kindness and respect make all the difference.”
What are your thoughts on this? Tell us in the comments.
