Soulmates Aren’t Always Lovers

Words by Gianna Sibal

When we hear the word ‘soulmates’, one common idea enters our head: happy ever afters with a lover, romantic partner, boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife. Your significant other.

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We get it wrong a lot of times though. With our partner, we’d think: Oh, we’re going to be together forever. 

And then the breakup comes.

I’m not saying that this goes for all cases. Obviously, some who have thought the same, were blessed and lucky enough to see that thought come true.

And though I’m really into the romantic side of things, I still believe this: having a soulmate isn’t always about the romance. Soulmates aren’t always lovers.


And I wish more people understood this. The word doesn’t have to be boxed into a romantic relationship—it’s kind of weird, isn’t it? We think about someone who’s going to be with us for a lifetime, and yet, we never think: Oh, my best friend is my soulmate. Oh, my sister is my soulmate. Oh, my dad is my soulmate.

To me, a soulmate is defined as a single soul split into two bodies—and there’s a required and incredible amount of trust, love, and understanding between the two of you that you can never have with anybody else. Your heart recognizes someone else’s—and I think that’s beautiful.

It’s amazing, then, if your romantic partner and your soulmate are one person. But for others, it doesn’t work that way, and I just want this to be a reminder: the idea of having soulmate isn’t limited to the romantic aspect. The concept of two beings understanding each other to a degree that they know you more than you know yourself, crosses all boundaries, regardless of whether the relationship you have is romantic or platonic. 


I feel lucky enough to have my best friend as my soulmate. I haven’t had a romantic relationship yet, but I already know she is my soulmate. We may not talk to each other every day, and we can go months without seeing each other, but I know I have her support and love from miles away, and she knows that she has mine. We know that we’re going to grow old together, we’re going to see each other be successful, and that we’re going to spend our birthdays and celebrate our weddings with each other. And it’s different—when I see her, it feels like I just talked to her the day before, even though I haven’t.


What I’m trying to say is, don’t limit yourself to looking for your soulmate romantically. Your soulmate might already be right beside you, and you just haven’t realized it. Soulmates aren’t always lovers.

Have you found your soulmate? What do you think? Let us know!