Words and photos by: Tiffany Tolones (IG: @camille_abitofmonica)
Do you remember the first day of the year? You were pumped up, saying “I will change for the better”. You even wrote a list of the things you wanted to change this year, the things you wanted to achieve, and the things you wanted to do.
Halfway past the year, it seems like nothing’s going your way. It seems like this year is not for you. Your 2017 is on the rocks. It’s not too late, though! You still have another half of the year left to get back on track.
You Can Be Happy Again is a book by esteemed life coaches and motivational speakers that can help us manage our problems and worries.
Here are 5 tips to make your 2017 better from life coaches at Winning Coaching Inc.
Identify your Dis-ease
When you say disease, you may think of the physical health impairment. It’s something that limits you into one place. But this DIS-EASE, as Life Coach Ning Tadena calls it, is a form of discomfort in your life – emotional baggage, worries, fears or anything else that might make you feel emotionally and mentally uncomfortable. When you properly identify your worries and fears, you can address them and get a step closer to happiness.
Focus on your passion and maximize your potential.
Life Coach Ning Tadena continues the discussion of solving your DIS-EASE by focusing on your life’s passions – everything you want to achieve in – and your potential – everything you can do and the probability of being good at it.
She let everyone draw their own heart locks, on one side as the passion, and the other as the potential. At the center of it is your worries and what they call, “work ons” – the things that makes you uneasy. She says that as your drive for your passions continue, and your capabilities and potential keep on growing, these sides of your heart will eventually shrink the past pain and suffering away.
Learn to see the bigger picture.
While we are stuck in life crises, we tend to be so emotionally invested in them that we just carried away sometimes. We forget to look at the bigger picture. Life Coach Edwin Soriano calls this “The Reporter’s Choice.” In life, we have different options and routes we can take every time we decide on something – big or small.
There are 4 types of people involved in this activity. Person A is the one who has gone through the actual experience during that moment, Person B is looking at A and reports what is happening to him but still gets emotionally involved with A. Person C is beside B, reporting on how B reports A’s situation. And finally, there’s D, observing them all in the back. Who are we in times of crisis?
The type of person we are here tells a lot about how we deal with our “work ons.” It is in our hands on how we’ll face the crises.
Will it be like A, B, C, or D?
Confront previous conflicts in your relationships.
Confronting people may not be the best trait of Filipinos. We always try to make peace with everyone and not to make any conflict. Throughout the workshop, this is where I tear up. Admittedly, I have some issues with my family and friends, and when we were asked to think of the person we think that we will never talk to again, it made me cry.
We simulated a conversation with that person you don’t talk to anymore (who was named J,) we tried to be in J’s position.
It opened realizations that communicating with one another should be clear, so there will be no misunderstanding. You must think about the perspective of that person and try to put yourself in their shoes. Everyone has their own pace of straightening things out, but it wouldn’t hurt to directly settle the matter with that person. After all, what escaping and running away can do is just buy you time. It doesn’t solve things and the only way to move forward past that is to confront it directly.
If you are mad about your sister eating the box of chocolates you bought for yourself, then talk to her about it. If you have issues with your parents about things, tell them. If you and your ex parted in bad terms, perhaps it is time to confront him/her. People are not mind readers, you need to actually tell them what is going on, so they can figure out ways how they can help you.
Healing cannot happen if you still haven’t move past the pain. It cannot happen if you’re still dwelling in the sufferings of the past.
Sometimes, it’s all a matter of perspective and will power.
With these in mind, sometimes, it is all about having the courage to move past the DIS-EASE, focusing on your passion and potential, and seeing the bigger picture and confronting your worries and relationships. Sometimes, it just takes courage, renewed perspective and will power to make your life happier and better.
We all have our choices. If you want to have a happier, better life with less worries and fears, then you must have a solid resolve to get it. Life may stir you up in every direction, but you have to firmly believe that you can be happy again.
The next leg of You Can Be Happy Again seminar is happening this August.
What are your tips to a better and happier life? Let us know in the comments below!